i hold true to the fact
that not everything in life is fair.

so if not everything is fair,
then why does everything always happen for a reason?

Are the unjustly occurances that happen to the innocent
a happening of fate?
or is it just the undeserving getting lucky?

is fate ordained by God?
or is there no fate at all?
do we change our minds too many times to even say that fate controls our destiny?
ultimate question:
If there was fate then why would God create the people He knew where going to Hell?


seem fair?
well life isn't...

sweet dreams.

i am currently the girl that lies awake
spilling her inner most thoughts on this box that
which most of the words will end up miss typed.
but i guess thats just my style now-a-days.


its later than usual at this state of mind.
my head is relieved from the world
because i know that sleep is bound to come,
taking me away from this wretched place
and drifting me off into the imagination i call my dreams.
if only for a little while...

i will wake up in time
to put on the face i am unsure of
and walk out into the halls of the memories
i will probably forget in the long run...

so strap on tight,
cause the night is about to end.

when it storms
i think of what we could have been.
how you were the who was the one who knew i was afraid,
and you were the one that call months later to check and tell me it was ok.

its when it lightenings that i miss you the most,
but then my largest dream was the one that got shot down the hardest
and i was the one that fell
while you walked away.

only until now i stood back up
and redeemed myself


but then here comes the thunder again.

the vacation spot of a life time is right here in my room.
its the place where all of the distresses of the days are thrown in my floor,
shoved under the bed and in crevices where they can never be ruturned.
only in my room
can i cry my self to justify the worngs.
only in my room
can i completly be myself.
only in my room
have i echoed the real my soul from the inside out.
and only in my room
can my opinions become factual.


no one judges in my room
because i have no one to judge.

there is only me
in my perfect little sanctuary.
my room